Sabotage

I've been sabotaging my weight loss all month.  I'm not sure what's wrong with me.  The food I'm cheating with isn't even good, I just shovel it in my face and regret it afterwards. 

I talked to my therapist about it yesterday.  I think part of me is afraid to lose the weight. I've been fat for so long, it's just been easier that way.

This morning I resisted the temptation of bad foods. I think I'll just start telling myself that I don't need that.  I might want it,  but I don't need it.  If I don't start today,  I'll look back weeks,  months from now and wish I'd started today. I'm going to take it one day, one meal,  one snack at a time.  Be good,  eat the things that fit in to my macros and if I slip up,  don't throw the rest of the day away,  just start again at the next meal/snack. I have control. I need to make the conscious decision to choose better foods.

35 more lbs to my first goal, which is a lot less than the 50 lbs it was just last month. I can do this.